Monday, January 19, 2015

Good Morning Sunshine!

Well I know for sure that this week was a turning point in my mission- HALLELUJAH!

I thought that I had what it took to be a decent missionary and things were looking up. We had people coming to church, we were working hard and for some reason we both felt like we had done nothing. I was so confused, I asked the district leaders why we felt like this and he asked us the usual questions pertaining to prayer, faith, talking to everyone... etc. Stress started taking over and I because mush. I'm grateful for my companion who called the STL's for me because I didn't know how to put into words "I'm shutting down and I can't feel the spirit anymore." So sister pimentel took over for me.  We ended up going down to Lawrence 20 minutes later and did some service for a woman named Joan Holmes who has a horse ranch. [for those who know me, I am allergic to horses.. so you can imagine who it went] It went great! There was about 8 missionaries there, after we went on trio splits and it was probably one of the best experiences thus far. Sister Barlocker and Sister Wheadon are who I went out with, we tracted into an Atheist(who said he wasn't interested, but told us after much discussion that he would look into it) a Catholic and sang. At dinner we were at Jimmy Johns and a lady walked in WASTED. She was out of her mind drunk and she kept telling us that "I don't drink this much, I don't usually drink", then Sister Barlocker asked our intoxicated sister if she wanted to learn about the gospel. Her response started out decent and then turned into her bashing us. "Christians are fake! when I was homeless they turned their back on me!" Thats when the Pagans came and took her in.. Somewhere in the conversation she turned into some mad black woman and started snapping her fingers at us.. It was really hard not to laugh.. The church is true and God is awesome.
At church, there was about 20 people there including the 6 missionaries. We had a High Counselor come with his family and they spoke in sacrament meeting about the Plan of Redemption and the Atonement.

I was given a commitment from Sister Barlocker to have a heart-to-heart with God. So I did, and basically I want to relate it to the same experience that Enos had. There was sooo much doubt in my mind that caused me to feel inadequate and unworthy to serve a mission. Till he told me "Don't think about it".  I understand that we are to try our best, but when we try so hard that it becomes our will and not Heavenly Fathers, that's when we fall short. All last week I had tried so hard to find people to teach and had to force myself to be excited about everything that wasn't working out. However, I cannot describe the love that I felt from God when I got my answer. That was my witness that he does answer prayers and he does care. After we went out and got to work, and it was such a great day.

Miracle last night! For the past 9 months or more, Sisters have been teaching a man named Leroy. He is one stubborn man and he knows it, for the longest 3 months that I've known him, I asked him to pray and every time its been "no." He has always told us that we wouldn't like it because he stumbles over his words and all this other nonsense. So, last week he said he would pray...maybe. So I took my faith and the next visit he didn't. I was dying, then he told us he PROMISED he would pray next time. I held him to it. Last night, we went over and he talked a lot and so I jumped in- he was like "you didn't ask if you could talk." haha (he was kidding)  Long story short- HE PRAYED! It was the total opposite of what I thought was going to come out of his mouth. I just cried because I was so taken back by the spirit  which was very present during that prayer- I wish you could all have been there.

Over all, these last few days have been very inspiring and motivating. I have been so blessed to be here at this time. I'm grateful for everything that has gone wrong so that I could be strengthened. I know that this strength comes from our Savior and his love, which is everlasting and we can experience it when we apply the Atonement in our lives. I KNOW that there is power in prayer and that we are never alone. Turn to Him.

Have a great week!! Love you all!!

Sister Williams

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